May 2013
iamonlydorb:
sucysucyfivedolla:
the inside of your butt is warm enough to hardboil an egg
oh no I’m not falling for this one again
quazza:
i am reminded that english is a flawed language every time I am forced to use “that that” in a sentence
cyberthug13:
girl: Hey
me: sup
girl: sup
me: enough small talk
i my if was gay
me: im son gay was
my son: what
honksy:
*on my deathbed*
nurse: do you have any last words
me: i………..regret……being so……m…..mean………and heartless…………….
*the light goes out of my eyes*
*a small piece of paper falls out of my hand*
*the paper says one word only*
“sike”
dorfs:
Woops my 10 minute study break turned into a whole year
brandnewswastikas:
I like it when a girl has a food stain on her shirt because it means that she’s bad with spoons and will probably need me to feed her and I’m good with spoons so it will give me a chance to show off a little.
1 tag
meladoodle:
A GRILL IS A GRILL THIS IS SURELY SO AND FRIES SHOULD BE FRIES EITHER WAY BUT THIS GRILL IS NOT A HOME THIS IS NOT THE STOVE I KNOW
turtwink:
yabba dabba done with ur shit
ringostarring:
ok, new theory. maybe we should play so quietly, no one can hear us
well maybe we would sound so bad if some people didn’t try to play with big meaty claws
what did you say, punk?
bIG
MEATY
CLAWS
WELL THESE CLAWS AIN’T JUST FOR ATTRACTING MATES
BRING IT ON OLD MAN, BRING IT ON
no people let’s be smart and bring it OFF
OH SO NOW THE TALKING CHEESE IS...
zeram:
maozedung:
homework? decent grades? the bible said adam and eve not adam and achieve
i almost spit everywhere
doctorbutthole:
do u ever just
ohharvelle:
do i
watch a new show
rewatch another show
watch a movie
read a book
or read fanfiction
my life choices are so difficult
mowwwg:
“you can’t wear that!!!! people will get the wrong impression!!!”
the impression that i am a hot babe with an ass that just won’t quit???? honey that ain’t wrong that’s just fact
methlabrador:
hotbabysitter:
What if God was one of us? Just a stranger on a bus, masturbating violently.
fuck kind of bus do you ride
blackcopwhitecop:
i cant believe that nbc bought and cancelled tumblr
